For our Samhain circle this year, I wrote a ritual based in part on methods I use to process sorrow, guilt, and self-loathing. The various parts of this ritual guided the participants through simultaneously releasing grief and experiencing joy. After the positive response I received, I decided to post a modified version as a meditation for personal practice.

Let me start with a few caveats:

1. I am not a licensed psychologist, counselor, or therapist. Please do not take anything in this as professional mental health advice.
2. You may find the meditation tricky to read and perform at the same time. Rather than try to memorize anything, feel free to use the written meditation as a guide and add your own spin on it.
3. You may not want to include this sort of work in your daily practice. Some individuals have little difficulties frequently being exposed to grief. I have to carve out time where I know that I can process both the grief and resulting emotional fallout without it inconveniencing my obligations.
4. Be kind to yourself and have an emotional spotter available for aftercare, either in person or electronically. If you find yourself unable to process everything that comes up in a manner that is safe for both yourself and others, please reach out to someone who you know can and will help.

If you have any questions, please feel free to contact us via Facebook or email.

SETTING

Pick a location and position in which you are comfortable. Make sure that your surroundings are conducive to your meditation style (lighting, temperature, sounds, scents, etc.) Light any candles or incense you wish to use prior to beginning the meditation.

You will want to have something physical that you use as a representation of your grief and joy. CUUPs used rose petals at our circle; I usually use water, candle flames, or incense smoke. Feel free to use anything you want so long as it is external to yourself and involves a motion that you can use to signify going through each thing you are processing.

For the sake of convenience, I have used water for this version. This requires that you have a container the water is in and a location/container for the water to be poured. If you pour into a container, make sure that you have a location to put the water afterward (drains are perfectly fine for this purpose.)

MEDITATION

Make yourself comfortable and take a deep breath. If you wish to, you may close your eyes. Continue to breathe in deeply. Match your exhalations with your heartbeat. Feel the rhythm of Time attune itself to the beating of your heart.

In the house of your mind, enter the room where your sorrow is stored. Continue to breathe in deeply. Collect the losses you wish to remember and mourn today, but do not open them. Leave in that room the losses which are too close or not yet ready for release.

Now, enter the room where your happiness is stored. Collect the joys you wish to celebrate and remember today, but do not open them. Bring with you as many as you wish. Continue to breathe in deeply.

Leave these rooms behind. Open everything you have brought. Allow yourself to mourn your losses and celebrate your joys together. Continue to breathe in deeply.

Bring these losses and joys with you into the world and let it share in them with you. Continue to breathe in deeply and open your eyes if they are closed.

One at a time, speak or think of the losses and joys you bring for remembrance, pouring water for each one.

When you have finished, say, “For all that has been lost and no longer remembered, I grieve.” Pour half of the remaining water.

Now say, “For all that has been gained and not praised, I rejoice.” Pour the remaining water.

Make yourself comfortable and take a deep breath. If you wish to, you may close your eyes. Continue to breathe in deeply.

In the house of your mind, enter the room where your happiness is stored. Place your joys where you wish them and remember to visit as you need to strengthen yourself in your daily life. Continue to breathe in deeply.

Now, enter the room where your sorrow is stored. Place your losses where you wish them and remember to release more of them as you are able. Continue to breathe in deeply.

Leave these rooms behind. Feel the rhythm of Time resume its normal speed. Take a deep breath. Return to this world and those who share it with you.

Picture by Hannah Nutt, 2018.

Hannah Nutt

Coordinating Officer 2017-2018